Taking Time Out

I would just like to take this time to say that I am a child of the 80's (I only missed a year and a half of it!...Yes, I am THAT old! LOL) I grew up on the great movies of the 80's like The Lost Boys and Monster Squad....and the not so great movies like Mannequin and Weekend at Bernies (how they BOTH got sequels, I will NEVER understand).

I grew up crushing on actors like Corey Haim and when I heard of his passing early yesterday morning, the tears flowed. It is such a shame that Hollywood has the general public clamoring to join and yet, those we idolize struggle so hard. I have a friend who is an actor in Hollywood...yes you have heard of him and NO I am not telling...and I see how hard it is. They work so hard to stay on top and pick the right movies so that we continue to see them as relevant.

I see talent go down the drain and get wasted because of drugs including alcohol and wish I could change it. If we could think of all the amazing people who would still be with us. It is a dangrous business that has us all captivated and wanting to be a part of it. It seems so glamourous and how many of us have ever been window shopping and have looked at that Prada bag or AMAZING pair of shoes and wished for just that moment we had their bank account.

Corey Haim is the latest in a line that NEEDS TO STOP. It is too easily excessible in Hollywood to fall into the traps that money can bring. I watched him grow up in a sense and I feel as though I huge part of my childhood has died along with him,

I am amazed at the strength and courage of Robert Downey, Jr. for pulling himself out of the rut and for seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

I almost don't know what to say about Haim. It still feels a little surreal. I seriously thought that I would wake up this morning and it would have all been a dream and that they were announcing his role in Lost Boys 3 (and YES THEY ARE MAKING ONE). I feel as though a chunk of the 80's rested soley in the laps of the Coreys and I hope that Feldman will continue to carry the torch in his honor.

Life is short and life is precious. We must cherish every second and never waste an opportunity to share our heart with others. It may come back a little damaged, but each new tear and each new wrinkle is the mark of a life well lived. Never take for granted what life has to offer. To quote another star gone to soon...."Nothing is trivial".

Life is for living. Love is for sharing.

I will miss you, Sir. I hope the pain and the struggle is gone so that you might truly rest in peace knowing that you leave behind a legacy and some great films. Missing you already.

- Quote is Brandon Lee from his last role, THE CROW -

Thank You and Good Night

The end of an era. It is really sad to think that the portrait studio that got me started is gone. I had Adam bring me to the Woodbury location so that I could see. I knew that if I didn't see it with my own eyes than I would never believe it. It was so sad to walk up to the storefront and see the signs in front, blocking off the entrance. It was so surreal. Yet, there it was. It was dark and empty. It really did break my heart. The end of things with the company left me with a bitter taste in my mouth, but there was still that voice in the back of my head that just couldn't (and would't) be silenced. The voice of reason that reminded me that this was where it all started. This was the stepping stone to the "something greater" that I have found with JCP+D. And I would like to share those happier memories in this blog post so that I might remember what that spark was that started with KK and became a flame of passion through changing gears.

It was not the enviornment or even the staff that provided the spark, but the corporate view on photography that originally peaked my interest. The Employee Handbook said some great things about their views on the customers. How every customer deserves great pictures no matter what. EVERYONE who worked for the company, even the CEOs and the corporate levvel execs were once photographers. Printeing same day was also an awesome feature from a guest standpoint (and I will also point out the negatives of same day printing when I get to the rant section about KK). In the beginning I was so excited to be a part of a portrait studio enviornment and I was thrilled to death that I was doing something that I loved. The passion was sparked dully at KK and if it were not for working there I would not be where I am now. We all have to start somewhere.

That is one thing that I can say about Kiddie Kandids. It was a great starting place. It was like being able to play in the minors before stepping up to bat with the big boys in the major league. It was a smaller enviornment and a smaller customer base. It was exactly what it needed to be for a first studio job. I don't know that I would love photography as much if I hadn't had the experience at Kiddie Kandids. I love a challenge and Kiddie Kandids allowed me the challenge of learning by doing. I learned so much about my vision as a photographer and the direction I want to take. It was really a launching pad for me. I know now who I am as a photographer and I know what I want to accomplish. The passion that I have for the field only intensified working there.

I am where I am today because of Kiddie Kandids. I owe that job so much. I will never be able to regret my position with Kiddie Kandids for it brought me to the edge of my patience, strength and sanity...and pushed me over the edge sometimes, but I made it through and I am only that much stronger because of it. Every experience in life is a learning opportunity if we choose to see it that way.

REST IN PEACE, KIDDIE KANDIDS AND THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES!

The End of Where It All Began

I found this little bit of information out on Monday morning:

Kiddie Kandids Announces Closure

Sandy, Utah - January 10th, 2010

Kiddie Kandids, a Sandy, Utah based chain of photography studios, has ceased operations, effective immediately. This shutdown occured as the result of an abrupt and unforeseen loss of funding from is banks. Kiddie Kandids' operations have been particularly challenged by the economic climate of the past 18 months and its lenders have informed the company that they will no longer provide funding for Kiddie Kandids' immediate cash needs. "Without continued funding, Kiddie Kandids was unable to meet its imminent financial obligations," said Dave Merrill, Kiddie Kandids CEO. "We have exhausted all possible avenues for funding and have come to the end of the road. This is truly unfortunate in light of the great team of employees and the great customers that made Kiddie Kandids a leading national children's photography studio. It is our hope that that if the assets are purchased out of bankruptcy that the buyer will consider hiring back many of our employees". In light of the unforeseen termination of funding by its lenders, Kiddie Kandids intends to file a voluntary petition for relief under Chapter 7 of the Bankruptcy Code in the coming days

Prior to its closure, Kiddie Kandids was one of the nation's premier children's portrait studios, specializing in newborn, infant, toddler and pre-school portrait photography . Founded in 1974, Kiddie Kandids grew from a single camera in a mall kiosk to a nationwide network of 184 hi-tech portrait studios. The majority of Kiddie Kandids' studios are located within Babies 'R' Us retail stores across the county.

--source kiddiekandids.com

I am in shock and not quite sure what to think or how to feel. As I said in my initial Blog Post, the birth of my daughter sparked that fire in me to pursue my love of photography. The love was always there, but it was looking into her eyes when I knew that I wanted to be able to remember that moment with perfect clarity. My memories of her birth seem much more vivid as I am able to look at the photos from that day and everything comes back to me as if it were yesterday.

I recall a time when Mackenzie was roughly a week old and we were shopping at Babies "R" Us for some clothes for her. We walked past the in-store portrait studio known as Kiddie Kandids and figured we would stop and see what it would cost to get some photos of Mackenzie done. The manager at the time, Cyndi answered all of our questions and got us excited about coming in and capturing some memories. We never looked back and took photos once a month. I came in so frequently not only because my daughter was stinking adorable (which she was and still is), but also because I was becoming addicted. It was a rush telling Cyndi, "What if we try this.." and having her tell me that I was coming up with some good ideas. She even asked me if I had ever considered a career in photography. Obviously, seeing as I had a newborn baby and I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could, the passion was still fueled only in the form of hobby and the occasional freelance work for friends or family so I just laughed it off. But, after spending a whole year bonding with this wonderful little girl, I knew it was time to rejoin the working world. But, the question came down to whether or not I wanted to return to the pharmecutical work that I had been doing prior to the birth of Mackenzie? It was something that I was good at and that had a future. The medical industry is one of the few fields that has been continuing to flourish during this economic crunch. But my heart and my mind were leading me in two completly different directions. Ultimately, I decided to at least apply at a portrait studio and see what happens. The worst that would happen would be that I wouldn't be hired and I would have the pharmacy to fall back on.

But where to start? Where should I apply? The answer came pretty easily...Why not go to the place that started it all for me. Why not apply at Kiddie Kandids? Unfortunately, the Woodbury location that had been MY photographer was not hiring to turn ME in to a photographer. So I tried the location that was closer to where I was living at the time in Bloomington, Minnesota. Shock of all shocks, I was hired! I was a professional photographer!! I was on cloud nine and I didn't think anything would be able to bring me down. In the beginning it was wonderful. I was taking pictures of gorgeous children and I felt self-validated being a part of something as powerful as capturing memories for people. The training was limited. I was given an employee handbook and shown a few poses of the "required posing" that we had to have in the sittings. But for the most part I chit chatted with my boss the whole time and wasn't really learning much. At the time I was okay with it as I was (and still am) more of a learn by doing kind of person. But I didn't ever feel very validated in my work. I was talked about behind my back. I was made fun of and so was my work. I heard from many people throughout the store that the girls that worked there we constantly saying that my photography was terrible and that they didn't understand why I was working there. I couldn't help but wonder what it was that I was doing wrong. I was capturing images that made many a mother cry and I was consistently selling some of the more expensive packages with my photography. I was also a little angry. They wanted to ridicule my photography, yet they weren't training me. It was always "This is wrong". I can recall twice where I was complimented on my work in the fourteen months that I worked for the company. So I just continued to give the guests what they want and put them first. It was after my first Christmas with the company when I noticed the first of the changes. They introduced something known as the "Faces Galleries" These were High Contrast Black and White Photos that could be tilted....kinda cool. The effect was gorgeous! I was excited to start playing with it and sharing it with some of my regulars. But that was when we sat down to watch the video from corporate that would go over the selling process for these new collections and my whole view point changed.

It started off great. We would offer the guests the same things we offered in the Ultimate Collection (which was our most expensive at around $139.99) and we would offer them choices of three different "Faces" pieces that would all come framed in addition to that. It sounded awesome. Then the price came up $300. I was a little leary as we were in a place in the economy where things were slow going. I wasn't sure that our guest would be able to spend that kind of money. Then they told us they wanted one a day....I remember thinking that this was not going to be very likely.

I gave it a valiant effort and was able to sell a few of the Faces Galleries and continued to do what I did everyday. Before I knew it, over a year had gone by and Summer was upon us. The beginning of the end for me was the June Promo Prep Meeting. They very first thing that was said was that the "New Kiddie Kandids" would be focusing their efforts even more on the Faces Galleries and that the Packages they were hoping were going to become a thing of the past. With that they unveiled Phase Two of the Faces Plan with was to raise the prices of the existing Galleries to $330 and also to include a $550 and $700 Gallery. I was concerned for I had already seen that the Galleries we were currently operating with were a hit or a miss. The customers either loved them or hated them...there was no middle ground. And to be honest, there was more hate than love...the pricetag was just too high.

The thing that stopped me dead in my tracks though, was the fact that they were doing away with their "Milestone" program which was an awesome deal for the customers that entitled them to free extra items or discounts at the important milestones of their children's first ten years of life. It was a huge sellling point and the guest loved that they were being given special items to mark those special times. It made the customers feel as though we were celebrating their children with them...which I always thought was an amazing thing to be able to share with our guests. I brought my concerns to the my manager's attention, telling her that I didn't know how to explain to our customers why we were getting rid of the Milestones and that I didn't know how to justify selling a $700 package. It was her next words that would haunt me and lead me to the path that I am on now. She said to me, "Well, if the guests aren't willing to pay the money then you can guve them directions to JCPenney's." I was shocked and frankly a little appalled.

I went home that night and told my husband all about the eye-opening meeting. He told me that no matter what I decided that he would back me and be on my side. I thought long and hard about what to do and in the end, I did what came naturally to me. I sat down and I wrote. I wrote about the pros and cons of my job and I found myself very surprised with the results. Everything that was on the plus side had to do with the customers and not with company. It was a sad realization that a company whose philosophy used to be that every child no matter their age, physical ability or financial status deserved good pictures was now turning their back on that viewpoint and focusing the direction of the company on the almighty dollar. I told Adam that I had no idea what to do and that I needed time to thinj. He told me that he would support my decision, but he also said that I should pay careful attention to how I felt at work and really think about if that was somewhere that I wanted to be. When I got to work for my shift my boss pulled me into the back room and said she needed to talk to me. When we got there she proceeded to tell me that she had been informed that I had some pictures of my daughter that had been taken at the studio on my MySpace and Facebook pages and that I needed to take them down. She also said that my freelance site needed to come down and that I was not allowed to have that if I worked for the company. I was shocked since one of the first questions that I had asked her when she interviewed me was if there would be any conflict of interest involved with my continuing my freelance career since it was more weddings, seniors and family reunions and things that we did not do in studio. She had told me at the time that it was fine. I also asked her if she would be having a similar conversation with the others on staff since they ALL had pictures that were taken in the studio on their social networking pages. She told me that it was none of my business, wrote me up and told me to get to work. It was obvious to me in that moment that I should have kept my fool mouth shut after the meeting if there was any chance that I wanted to stay with Kiddie Kandids. For it was clear that I had made some enemies in standing up for what I believed in. It was also clear that I was not working for the same Kiddie Kandids that I had applied for fourteen months prior. Though that seemed like a lifetime ago. And, in some ways, it was. So when I got home from work that night I again sat down to write....this time a resignation letter. I stated my feelings about the changes that were being made and that I could no longer continue working for a company that cared more about making a dollar than it cared about its customers. I e-mailed the letter and had a minor heart attack on the spot. I was freaking out. What had I done? I had thrown away a job I loved. Adam told me that I had made the right decision and that it was not the same company anymore. He told me that he was proud of the fact that I was strong enough to stand up for what I believed in and that this meant something better would be coming my way.

In the end, I know I made the right choice. Where am I now? Well, when I sat down to look for a new job, what company name was in my head but the one that my boss had mentioned during the Promo Prep Meeting.....JCPENNEYS. It was the best decision I ever made and it has made all the difference. But, this blog post is about the end of the place where it all began for me. At the end of the day I am saddened to hear that KK is the latest casualty in the economic disaster we are all facing. It was started with the best of intentions and had the potential to go far. It is very sad that the initial vision of the company will not be reality. Money IS the root of all evil and if you let yourself get caught up in the rat race it can drive good people mad. I am sorry for the loss that my former co-workers are facing and hope that they bounce back from this quickly. The company is unable to pay it's employees for their last two weeks of week and is not able to provice insurance. With the state of the company being what it is the employees also are ineligible for COBRA. It is a huge mess and I can tell already that this could and probably will get very ugly before all is said and done. As the situation is updated, I will probably be venting through my blog a little so this is most definately not the last you will hear about this. My next blog will discuss the positive remembrances I have of the company and will be, in a sense, my farewell.

Thanks for tuning in... See you next time

It All Starts Somewhere

I never thought that I would be someone who would set up a blog. Although I am not the kind of person to hide my feelings (quite the opposite) and although I have been "a writer" for as long as I can remember, it just didn't seem like it would be something that I would have the time or patience for. But, so much has happened to me lately that venting seems the only option. It seems only logical to do it in this forum where I can choose to share with those close to me, or as a place to release those inner demons that I don't want others knowing about.

My name is Sara Fried. I am a daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend, a mom....and a photographer. As someone who has always been the hardest on myself, I chose to hide the negative feelings I had for myself by hiding behind the lens of a camera. Through doing so I also developed a love for it deeper than I ever would have imagined.

That's what this blog is about. My life through the lens. The things I see through that lens provide a beauty that is truly unexpected. What is captured either on film or digitally is something that is there for us to always remember moments that time may otherwise forget. Every moment can be a cherished memory and I love being a part of capturing those cherished memories for others.

As for the rest of my life, I have a daughter who was born April 29th of 2007 and completely changed my views of the world. She is remarkably bright and exceptionally gorgeous. I know I ssee her through a Mother's eyes, but there is something truly special about my little Mackenzie. She started talking at three months and is now at the vocabulary level of a five year old though she is only two. She keeps me balanced and takes away all the "icky" of a bad day with a single smile. She was the inspiration for my actually trying to turn passion into reality and pursue a career in photography. It is all because of her and I hope to one day find words that are powereful enough to express my love, appreication and thanks to this oh-so special little girl that has so drastically changed my life for the better. I warn you in advance that I brag about my little on a lot and I love her to the ends of the Earth. You should know that know because you will hear lots about Mackenzie and her adventures during this blog. From her Rock Band drum skills to her preparations for preschool that are looming just on the horizon, you will know her as well as I do in no time at all...and probably love her just as much, too!

I also have to take some time to tell you about the man who made it all possible. My husband, Adam. I joke with him all the time that he is way too cute to be my husband and that we are luck that Mackenzie looks more like him. He is one of the kindest men I have ever met. He goes above and beyond to ensure the happiness of others and would give the shirt off his back if you asked him to. And, for some reason that I thank God for every single day...he chose me to be his wife. It was the best thing that ever happened to me that I met a man so amazing. I loved him from the minute I met him (and even before...which I will explain in another blog). The love grows more every day and I am so thankful for the awesome family that I have. Adam is strong, sweet, caring and an awesome Daddy. He is also mad good at Puzzle and is kind of a game freak...we all have our thing, I guess!

Thanks for taking the time to delve into my life. I hope you like stopping and checking in with me. Happy Reading!